Your favorite distraction (nefarious) wrote,
Your favorite distraction

On the subject of bed sheets...

Many people tuck their bed sheets between the mattress and the box spring. This is mainly due to tradition, insanity, whiskey, or a combination of those 3 things. What they all fail to realize is that 'free form' bed sheet/blanket organization is vastly superior. I will break down the reasons thusly:

1) Improved thermal retention using the patented 'nefarious foldover maneuver', which is explained below.
2) Using free form does not apply any undue pressure on the body, since the sheets/blankets are not anchored down.
3) Allows for another patented maneuver, the blanket roll-up, for especially cold nights.

It is obvious that it's time for tucking in blankets/sheets to go the way of the sober high school principal. Come on, it's the 21st century!!

Nefarious foldover maneuver:
Lay down in desired position. Lift feet high off of the mattress, wait for the sheet/blanket to curl back under your feet, then bring them back down, completely surrounding your feet and lower legs. This affords a much more comfortable, draft free foot environment.
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