Your favorite distraction (nefarious) wrote,
Your favorite distraction
nefarious

What

This year, Melissa and I bought a 16 game pack of Mariner's tickets to satisfy our need for baseball. We're 4 games through it, and here are some interesting statistics so far:

Opponents:

Wins: 4
Runs: 22
Walks: 18
Annoying fans: 10293 (1 annoying angels fan, 10292 fucking annoying fucking yankee fans)

Mariners:

Wins: 0
Runs: 6
Walks: 5
Runners left on base: 52

Personal statistics:

Foodstuffs consumed:

$9.00 beers: 1
Peanuts: 435
Kettle corn: 1/2 pound
Sunflower seeds: I don't count these
Ice cream in a little plastic helmet: 1
Dixie's BBQ hotlink + chicken + 'the man' hot sauce: 2
Polish dogs from the stand outside the ballpark which has always played the same god damn song on a loop at every game I've ever been to ever: 1, with onions and dijon mustard (I want me a yella dog)

Miscellaneous:

Number of times:

I heckled Derek Jeter and he then struck out: 1
I heckled A-Rod and he then hit a home run: 1
The #1 annoying yankee fan bitch stopped talking during the game: 0
The #1 annoying yankee fan bitch stood up right in front of me before a play was over: 203
I asked the #1 annoying yankee fan bitch to sit down: 1
I realized that I must have had some 'the man' hot sauce residue on my finger while taking out my contacs: 1
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